Posts Tagged empowerment

Jada Pinkett Smith’s Aha! Moment

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She tried to micromanage the world.  By letting go and doing less, she realized she could actually be more.

About a year and a half ago, I realized I was about to hit a wall. My husband, Will Smith, and I were going through a major transition-besides acting, directing, writing, and producing, we’d started the Will and Jada Smith Family Foundation to support urban families through education, health, and arts programs. At the same time, I was trying to keep my family life healthy and strong and take care of our kids, Trey, 16; Jaden, 10; and Willow, 8. I’ve always been a caretaker; I think a lot of women are. We take care of everybody else first, and very rarely do we think about ourselves.

I grew up in a neighborhood in Baltimore that was like a war zone, so I never learned to trust that there were people who could help me. I was also stuck in the idea that taking care of others was the way to create good relationships. As a result, I tried to micromanage my world.

One day I was so overwhelmed I thought I might be crushed under the weight of all the responsibilities I’d taken on. I pray and meditate every day, and when I started meditating that morning, I felt that God was telling me, Surrender or explode. All of a sudden, I was released. The stress was gone, and in that stillness came the solution: The less I do, the better things will go.

But it’s one thing to have an idea and another to grasp it. Okay, so I realized that by doing less, I can be more. But what did that mean? And how could I apply that to my life? I started with my family. It’s not just about being with them; it’s about being present while I’m with them. That area had been slipping a bit, but on this day I focused on my kids. I turned off my BlackBerry and didn’t take a single call or check my e-mail. You know how you feel as though if you stop, the whole world will fall apart? Well, it didn’t. For a while, everybody was like, “Where’s Jada? We’ve got to get this answer! This needs to happen now!” But it all went fine without me.

So the next thing I did was trust that the people we’d hired could do their jobs. When I was trying to control them, they felt suffocated and invalidated. When I let go, they felt empowered, which created an atmosphere of harmony, and there was peace within the everyday chaos. I learned that surrounding myself with people who are able to help me is like being surrounded by tangible godliness.

Since then, it’s been a year of bliss. I don’t have to go around trying to save everybody anymore; that’s not my job. I took off the Control Freak crown, and now my headaches are over. That tiara may have been pretty, but it was just too damn tight.

- As told to Suzan Colón

global_entitylogo_omag_43x56http://www.oprah.com

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What’s Your Vision?

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I recently attended a creative retreat. You likely know the type I’m talking about. It’s a weekend where you absorb yourself in revealing a new definition of yourself and what you want your life to be about.

The days were amazing because something incredible happended. I committed to share everything I know about creating success as a thriving feminine entrepreneur … discovering and defining your niche and professional profile; the art of social media and service marketing; the skills of live event production and creating community; and … most importantly, igniting the feminine power to open to and allow a stream of prosperity & wealth!

I’ve come to discover that the most successful women in the world have realized something very important … lasting success begins with discovering a well-defined, authentic description of who you are, what you want and how you will get there.

1. Discover the Essentials of Your Vision.
2. Define the Language to Powerfully Describe It.
3. Design an Action Plan to Move Forward.

Learn More http://tinyurl.com/dfaas9

On April 23rd I’m hosting a 3-hour MASTER MINDSTREAMING workshop for 40 women who are focused on building a powerful platform of success that truly reflects , Soul-full and empowered expression of their REAL passion & purpose.

Are you a woman who is ready to step into your Divine expression of feminine power & success?

In 3 dynamic hours you will:

1. Envision Your Future!
2. Say YES to Your Highest Vision!
3. Define Ways to Put Your Vision into Action!

Learn more. http://tinyurl.com/dfaas9

Will you join me? I’d love to hear from you!

PS: This is a great community of women … you’ll meet and connect with empowered entrepreneurs, authors, experts, women in media, coaches, and more!

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Are You Charging What You Are Worth?

Are you afraid that people who need you can’t afford you?   And is this one reason why you discount your fees at times?

This article is provided by Women’s Earning Institute

I was talking about the topic of my new workbook Emotional Pricing~ How to Feel Great Charging What You’re Really Worth, and a colleague said to me, “I don’t know about all of that. I don’t feel right charging a ton of money—what about people who truly need help but can’t afford a lot?”

First of all, isn’t it interesting that she immediately assumed that charging what you’re really worth is a “ton of money”. Hmmm. You can bet that it will be hard for her to charge enough money because she assumes that it is just too much!

But here is the real issue: the fear that people who need you can’t afford you. So let me be clear about something: If you want to make more money, you need to work with a target audience who can afford to pay what you need. There simply isn’t any other way to say it, or do it.

I am very passionate about my work and I want to help the world as well, so I make sure I charge my full fee and make great money. Otherwise, I have no time and I feel resentful. (If people are not paying you enough money, it takes a lot of clients to pay the bills….) If I didn’t make enough money, I would eventually have to close my business and take a full-time position somewhere. And before I got to that point, I would experience a lot of deprivation and frustration with how little money I was earning. I doubt I would be in the best frame of mind to really do my best work. Being under financial stress is incredibly draining.

So I charge my full fee. Then, to “give back,” I do a certain amount of pro bono work that I feel really helps the world. I donate some of my time to causes I feel strongly about.

Years ago I heard the “Rule of the Three Fs.” Do your work for your full fee, do it for free, or flee. The point of the Rule of the Three Fs? Don’t discount! So, one way to feel like you are giving back is to do just that: give back. Charge your full fee and decide to donate a certain percentage of your time to a cause that could benefit from your work. It is a much cleaner way of doing business.

Doing a certain amount of pro bono work on the side can be very satisfying. Many powerful business women become strong pillars in their respective communities because they give back some of their time to causes and charities that are personally important to them. For example, I will occasionally do free seminars for organizations in my area that service disadvantaged women. Some of these women are domestic abuse survivors, or have lived their entire lives far below the poverty line. I care about these women, and know full well they can’t afford my fee, so I will do seminars a couple of times a year on how to ask for a raise, how to negotiate or how to raise your fees. I will talk with them about the pattern of underearning and discuss ways to stop underselling themselves.

These women are not my “target market” – they simply can’t afford me. But rather than discount myself or offer a sliding scale, I’ve found other ways to “give back.”

So stop with all the bartering, sliding scales and discounts. Charge your full fee. (Your “full fee” may still not be high enough. You may need to raise yours fees. But that is a different subject.) You’ll make more money with fewer clients if they pay you enough. Then use some of your time to truly give back to the world.

If setting or raising your fees feels difficult and you long to make more AND feel good about what you charge, then check out the rate-setting toolkit at www.ratesettingtoolkit.com. I created this toolkit for all women who do great work and deserve to make more money! Check it out. It will help you earn more with ease.

Copyright 2008 – Women’s Earning Institute
http://www.womenearning.com

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The Natural Flow of Life Is Light & Easy!

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I woke up this morning with an email from my friend and mentor, Dr. Sharron Stroud.
Her words: “Being in Fear removes you from the Flow of Life. The natural flow of life is easy and light.
Being in fear creates a dense, heavy energy in your body so you can’t connect with the lighter flow of life.”

What does it feel like to be in the flow?

For me, it comes in a continuous stream of fresh insights …. a deep connect with my intuition and creative solutions to the the situations and experiences at hand. And best yet, ENTHUSIASM, joy and appreciation come easy. CONNECTION, happiness and seeing the best first, effortless. Dancing in the possibilities, ever present. Yes, I’m a big fan of living in the flow of life!

Here what I know: When I’m in the denser energy of fear, I’m cutting myself off from life and all of the insights, solutions, answers, opportunities and new directions that are here for me now.

So, I’m making friends with fear like never before!
My mantra for today …. “Be Willing To Grow Beyond The Defined.”
I’m stepping outside of ALL perceived limitations and jumping into the flow and it feels GREAT!

Will you join me?

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